Boyfriends

• Finding a boyfriend
• How to keep a boyfriend
• Dealing with a breakup

Teen girls may want to consider the qualities they should be looking for when considering whether a young man would make a good boyfriend.

Putting the "Friend" in Boyfriend

It has been said, "Love is friendship that has caught fire." The same qualities that make a good friend are those that make for a good choice in a romantic partner. With that in mind, what makes a good friend?

Honesty

We value honesty in our friends. We need to know that we can take them at their word. Someone who says what they mean and means what they say is a good choice for a friend.

Respect

If someone is truly a friend, he or she will respect your wishes and not try to make you do something that makes you feel uncomfortable. This could range from decisions you make for yourself regarding using tobacco, drugs, or alcohol. In the case of a boyfriend, this also includes whether and how soon to become physically intimate.

Trust

Trust is very important in friendship. When we open up and share personal information about ourselves, we need to know that it will not be shared with other people. This same level of trust needs to be present in a relationship with a boyfriend. It takes real courage to open up and share who we really are with someone else. If that trust is betrayed, it is very painful.

Loyalty

A good friend is also someone who is loyal. If you have an understanding with a boyfriend that you will not date anyone else, then that should be the way both of you behave. If one of you finds that you are unable to stick to the arrangement, then you need to let the other person know. That is the mature way to deal with things.

Acceptance

Another quality that makes a good friend is that of acceptance. We all have qualities that we don't really like about ourselves. A good friend (or boyfriend) will take us just as we are, "warts" and all. Consider it a red flag in a relationship if the other person is pressuring you to conform to a certain image they have of who you should be.

Shared Interests

Shared interests can be thought of the as the glue that holds a friendship together. You may like a person immensely but without something in common, it is quite difficult to keep a friendship alive. You shouldn't feel pressured to adopt all of the same interests as your friends or your boyfriend, though. A better strategy is to be open to learning about what the other people in your life find fascinating, as long as they show the same tolerance and openness about your interests. Friendship is a two-way street.

If you choose a boyfriend based on the qualities that you consider valuable in a good friend, you will have a better chance of having a good relationship. These qualities are important in romantic and platonic relationships.

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