Effects of Peer Pressure

If you are a parent of a teenager, you may be concerned about the effects of peer pressure. In this expert interview with author and licensed social worker, Carrie Silver-Stock, learn how your teen's friends may be influencing his/her actions and behavior.

Carrie Silver-Stock, MSW, LCSW

Carrie Silver-Stock has a Masters in Social Work and she has counseled teens most of her adult life in many settings: summer camps, group homes, community mental health centers, in juvenile detention centers and in school systems. After discovering that she would like to help girls on a global scale, she left the school system and founded Girls with Dreams. She is the author of two books, Secrets Girls Keep: What Girls Hide (& Why) and How to Break the Stress of Silence.

Negative peer pressure can be detrimental to self-esteem, influence clear decision-making, and increase stress. In the worst cases, it can lead to harmful or dangerous behaviors that could result in death, for example, car accidents involving alcohol, accidents, drug overdoses, and more.

When teens surround themselves with people who are making good decisions and who are involved with positive activities and choices, typically it makes teens want to be better. Having positive friends increases confidence and self-esteem. If this peer pressure happens at school, it could improve a teen's grades or even friends.

Academics

Positive peer pressure might:

• Improve grades
• Improve confidence
• Result in trying more things or getting involved at school

Negative peer pressure might:

• Lower school attendance
• Drop grades
• Impact ability to get into college
• Change group of friends

Family Life

Positive peer pressure might:

• Help relationships
• Result in more time with family
• Improve communication

Negative peer pressure might:

• Increase distance from family members
• Result in less time spent at home
• Increase negative behaviors/attitude
• Hurt communication

Boys and girls might feel pressure for different things, for example, a guy might be pressured to race his car or a girl might feel pressure to dress a certain way. In the end though, the effects are very similar for boys and girls. It’s hard to deal with pressure because everyone wants to fit in and be liked, boys and girls. Both can have negative and positive consequences depending on how they choose to react.

Teens might feel cool for having a group care about them or they might be worried or confused about how to make their friends happy while making a different choice. Teens might also feel like they won’t fit in or be liked if they don’t go with the crowd. Teens can also feel insecure about their beliefs or ideas.

Some might feel a sense of relief that they fit in somewhere. However, I get a sense from talking to teens that on a deeper level, most teens eventually feel bad or guilty about giving into peer pressure. It starts to erode their self-esteem and it doesn’t feel good always going against what they believe in.

When teens stand up for themselves and resist peer pressure it’s difficult to say what the reactions will be every time. It’s usually not easy. In some instances, friends will have more respect for the teen and leave him/her alone. Other times, it can initially be very stressful and friends might continue to pressure the teenager. However, once a teen gets over the initial shock and reaction, it will eventually boost self-confidence to its highest levels.

There is a problem whenever teens do not listen to their instincts and internal guide and are only doing what their friends say. This is the warning sign teens need to pay attention to and from here the consequences only get worse. Another clue that things are getting out of control is if the teen is doing something illegal or getting into trouble at school. Other severe consequences might include:

• Very tense relationship with parents
• Truancy
• Drinking or drug use
• Accident victim
• Drinking and driving
• Physical injury
• Pregnancy
• Health issues (such as sexually transmitted diseases)

• Create a space for open conversation

Talk to your teen about what is going on in his/her life. Make sure it’s a two way street and you’re not just in advice mode. If your teen is not wanting to talk as much as you do, hang in there. Consistently try to talk at least 10 minutes a day and build from there.

• Model behavior

Parents might have similar situations at work where they are feeling pressure from others or where they might need to take a stand. Talk to your teen about what you’re dealing with and how you’ve been able to deal with it positively.

• Watch for signs of change

If you notice any major changes in activity levels, friends, sleeping and eating habits, or drinking, these are red flags and shouldn’t be ignored.

• Be supportive

Being a teen is difficult. It’s hard to juggle school, friends, and peer pressure too. Keep this in mind as you’re helping your teen and remember you can empathize but that doesn’t mean you need to change your rules or standards.

LoveToKnow Teens would like to thank Carrie Silver-Stock, MSW, LCSW for her knowledge and advice on the effects of peer pressure.

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