High School Bullies

High school bullies bring to mind stolen lunch money and fights behind the bleachers. While these stereotypical ideas fit the category, the issue includes a much wider range of activities and is a growing concern for both teens and adults.

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services recently stepped up to educate parents, students and teachers about bullying. While there is no “one size fits all” description, their Stop Bullying Now campaign identifies certain characteristics that hold true in many cases.

These personal characteristics don’t automatically qualify a child as a high school bully, but they are seen in many children who engage in these behaviors. According to the Stop Bullying Now program, these bullying teens are more likely to exhibit the following personal characteristics:

• Dominance
• Impulsive and short-tempered
• Problems with authority and following rules
• Positive view of violence
• Little or no empathy for others
• Physical strength

Family background also plays a role. The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services suggests that the following family characteristics are often present:

• Little involvement from the parents
• Few limitations for the kids and little supervision
• Physical punishments from the parents
• Bullying in the home

The final set of commonalities discovered includes these typical behaviors exhibited by bullies.

• Fighting
• Vandalism
• Theft
• Consuming alcohol and smoking
• Truancy

Many forms of bullying exist amongst teens, depending on the specific situation and the teens involved.

Physical forms of harassment typically come to mind. The abuser uses physical force or threats to intimidate the victim. It may come in the form of hitting, pushing, punching, biting or getting in the victim’s face.

Verbal abuse often causes as much damage to the victim emotionally as hitting or pushing. Examples include threats, name-calling, gossiping, insulting the victim’s family or turning friends against her. Some adults may brush off this type, justifying it as a normal part of a teen’s life.

New technology initiated a new format for intimidation and harassment of other teens. Cyber bullying involves the use of technology to virtually taunt the victims. It takes place in a number of ways, including:

• Email
• Text messages on cell phones
• Chat rooms
• Social networking sites
• Web sites
• Instant message programs

Using the Internet to victimize others provides the instigator with anonymity, compounding the problem. Encourage your teen to alert you to these incidents immediately so you can deal with them together.

These behaviors are more than schoolyard pranks. They cause negative reactions in both the victim and the instigator, often escalating to more extreme behavior.

The victim in the situation experiences a variety of negative effects. In some cases, the victim still experiences trauma as an adult. The side effects may include:

• Stress
• Fear of engaging in normal activities in which the bully may be present
• Low self-esteem
• Depression
• Loneliness or isolation from peers
• Physical symptoms such as headaches or stomach problems

Instigating these attacks often causes the teen to become more violent and increase severe behaviors such as fighting, stealing, skipping school, struggling academically and drug abuse.

Parents, teachers and others in close contact with teens have the responsibility of dealing with this issue.

Teachers spend a great deal of time with teens, giving them an important role in the prevention aspect. Education on the topic from an early age teaches kids how to recognize and handle bullying. An anti-bullying campaign throughout the school community sets a positive tone for the students and teachers. It sends the message that these behaviors are not tolerated. In addition to teaching children the facts about the issue, teachers can:

• Set a positive and open classroom environment
• Provide support to students who are victims
• Communicate with other staff members about incidents
• Involve school administrators and other authorities as necessary

Open communication is important in any family. Let your teen know that you support him and want to help him in any way possible. A home environment full of support and respect encourages teens to seek help from their parents. Other ideas for parents include:

• Set expectations for behavior
• Stay involved in your teen’s life
• Communicate with teachers if bullying occurs at school
• Support anti-bullying efforts in the community
• Watch for signs of bullying in your teen

If your teen is bullied, consider these actions to help:

• Avoid placing blame on the victim
• Listen to your teen and encourage her to share the details of the incident
• Show support for your child
• Work with the school staff to resolve the issue

Creating a united front is one of the best ways to diminish bullying within the community. A strong support network between parents, teachers, law enforcement and health care professionals provides a supportive environment for teens. Community programs for teens help them feel a sense of accomplishment and they keep them engaged in productive activities.

Each teen comes from a distinct family life, with personal problems and issues. The manner in which the teen handles these issues can make a difference in how he behaves toward himself and others. A supportive community and home environment make major strides against all forms of bullying, allowing teens to enjoy the high school years.

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