You know what matchmaking for teens is; it's that annoying business of people trying to hook you up with someone else. When another person is trying to match you up with someone else it is tricky and seems to rarely work out. A better option is to be your own best matchmaker.
Meet Other Teens
This is the first step in any good match; meeting other teens you have something in common with.
- School: Here's an obvious place to meet other teens. Where else are you going to find so many people your own age in the same place at the same time? Finding a match in one of your cliques will give you something to talk about.
- At the _______ (fill in the blank): Where do you hang out? The mall, bowling alley, music or dance clubs, the cross-country track; most of the place you hang out probably have others your age with your interests hanging out there too.
- The internet: This is a much less safe way to find a date but matchmaking for teens does occur online. Be sure to read Safe Chat for Teens to make sure you know how to stay safe online or try this safe chat room.
- Through your pals: This is a good way to meet people because your friend can give you the whole scoop on the person.
Matchmaking for Teens Skills
To be your own best matchmaker takes some slick skills. Read up on these tips that can help improve your matchmaking for teen's skills. Listen before you leap: Someone may look awesome, but looks only go so far. Listen to what the person says and how they say it. Are they nice, rude, happy, or even interested in the same things you are? Are they talking about nonsense you don't care about? If you match up with someone there will likely be talking involved so make sure you like what the other person is saying - or at least know whether you can live with what they're saying.
Do you really like them, or…: It's important to know how you feel. It helps if you listen well and follow your gut. Maybe you really just want a friendship? Is there someone or something else forcing you into this match? Do you just want to 'be seen' with this person - that's not cool. Are all your friends saying, "You two would be so perfect together." Peer pressure is not a good reason to match up. If you're comfortable with someone one-on-one and in a group, you have things to talk about, and you're genuinely attracted to his or her personality it may be a match made in heaven.
Do they like you?: If someone had the answer to this ultimate puzzle they'd be a millionaire. Sadly, it can be hard and heartbreaking wondering day in and day out if someone likes you as much as you like them. There are some clues to look for.
- If he seems to go of their way to be in the same space with you or talk to you.
- When she tells all her friends everything about you; which of course is reported back to you by your close pals.
- He always suggests activities to do that you like.
- She always makes eye contact or figures out ways to get your attention.
If someone you like is doing all these things, it is a good sign he or she likes you. Go for it. It may be time to make that match official.
Making the First Date
One very important aspect of securing a match is making that first date. Once you know someone likes you, casually mention that you may be free this weekend if she's not busy. If he says yes, the two of you are getting closer to official "matchsville." Try the following tactics for your first date.
- Plan for realistic fun together. This may not be like in the movies or your favorite teen scene book. It may be a little less earth shifting than your typical love story based musical. That doesn't mean it won't be amazing. Just think realistically.
- Plan an activity you'll both like: If you hate baseball and know the other person loves it; you should still suggest something else. Pick an activity you'll both be comfortable with and have fun doing.
- Think about a group date: Group dates are the best for first dates. It takes a lot of the pressure off of you when some pals are there to back you up. If (gasp) things don't go well, it's nice to have some friends along for the horrible ride. Group dates are also safer and may make your parents more comfortable.
After the Date
After your first date is a good time to re-evaluate this matchmaking situation.
- Did you have fun?
- Did the other person?
- Did he call you after the date to chat; or are you dreading talking to her ever again?
- Do you still feel comfortable with the person?
And finally, do you see this as a great match or maybe just a ho hum match? Teens like you have plenty of time to date lots of different people and find a really great match one day. Teen dating and young love is serious; the feelings you have are very real. Still, remember just because someone's not the perfect match for you today that you won't find that one perfect match in the future. You'll have lots of chances in your life to be your own best matchmaker.